Tears and Rain
by Kaylenne
Summary: Tonks and Lupin have found comfort in each other's arms, but Lupin has been acting cold towards Tonks. Why is this? STORY COMPLETE. Sorry, I know I was going to add more chapters but I just don't have the motivation and I'm completely out of ideas. x
1. The Morning After

**Tears and Rain**

Song: Tears and Rain Artist: James Blunt

A/N: This song was played at one of my best friend's funeral. Since then I've listened to it over and over again. I'm not much of a James Blunt song, in fact, I really dislike his other songs but this one is just comforting.. don't ask why. Anyway, I think it deserves a little songfic. Anyway, I just had a random urge to write a Harry Potter fic, so.. uhm.. I dunno, it'll be quite a short one - I just felt the inspiration and

**_For Joanne - You were always with me through good times and bad, and I can still feel you with me until this day. I love you and I hope you're happy where you are now - I hope you found Brandon Lee._**

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Since Sirius had died, Remus found himself staring out the window constantly.. with this.. feeling, of nostalgia, of anger, of loss.. but most of all, of lonleyness. It seemed like everyone was dying around him - Sirius, Lily, James.. Wormtail was dead to him. The Wormtail he knew had died a long time ago.

_How I wish I could surrender my soul.  
Shed the clothes that become my skin.  
See the liar that burns within my needing._

He had bottled things up for far too long. He needed to release some anger, some frustration. Whatever it was that was burning inside of him - he felt it was killing him slowly, and painfully.

_How I wish I'd chosen darkness from cold.  
How I wish I had screamed out loud,  
Instead I've found no meaning._

There was some movement coming from his bed. He stared down at the face below him, a slight smile playing on her lips. Her long, fiery red hair shining from the sun through the window. She was beautiful. Remus shifted himself away from the window, and crawled into bed beside her. She awoke peacefully, one eye open. "Mmm.. morning, Moony."

Remus grinned and kissed her softly, stroking her hair. "I see you changed your colour before I went to sleep last night."

She grinned back, and looked pointedly at his body, "I see you only had the energy to put your boxers back on last night."

_I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,  
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.  
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.  
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble._

They had both suffered a great loss six months ago - Lupin lost his best friend, Tonks had lost her dear cousin. A loss with brought them closer together - to find comfort in each other's arms. This was meant to happen - Sirius wanted it. He had always hinted that Lupin and Tonks would be great together, with that sly grin on his face. This was definately his work.

And they were happy.

Tonks, still half asleep, shuffled herself closer to Remus, nuzzling his shirt softly. "I love waking up next to you." she smiled. "I love you."

_It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain._

"I love you too" replied Remus, still stroking her hair softly. She was amazing, she always made him laugh - they shared a bond - one that helped him get through these dark times. He sometimes wondered if things would be like this if Sirius was still alive - but he tried not to think about that. Each time he did, his anger at himself burned through him, it was like being under the Cruciatus Curse - although much less painful, he imagined.

_How I wish I could walk through the doors of my mind;  
Hold memory close at hand,  
Help me understand the years.  
How I wish I could choose between Heaven and Hell.  
How I wish I would save my soul.  
I'm so cold from fear._

Fighting the urge to stay warm and comfortable in his bed, Lupin rose, giving his loved one a gentle kiss on the cheek, and shoved on some clothes. Number 12 Grimmauld Place was really looking better these days - they had finally managed to remove that wretched portrait from the wall, Ginny and Hermione decorated the whole place, Ron and Harry, though unwilling, were very helpful to Molly, helping her clean the place up. It was starting to look like an actual home.

_I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,  
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.  
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.  
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble._

"Morning, Remus." Came a voice from the kitchen - over the sound of a fried breakfast sizzling away. Mrs Weasley had been quite taken to making breakfast the muggle way - she said that although it took longer, it was more enjoyable. Personally, Lupin couldn't see the fascination with it - it looked slow and boring, but it did taste better. He walked into the kitchen, unsurprised to see a highly entertained Arthur Weasley - still amazed by the way muggles made breakfast after so many months.

_Far, far away; find comfort in pain.  
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.  
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain_

This place had become his home - he had found a safe, loving family - although only the Weasleys were blood-related. Hermione had her own family - but it was like a second home to her. Harry loathed what family he had left, and felt that this was his real family - everyone except Ginny, whom he cared about on a much deeper level - one that he could not tell her, because he didn't want her to get hurt. Everyone he loved got hurt - it wasn't fair. He cared about her far too much to let anything happen to her.

They were far from normal - but at least they found love in each other.

_It's just tears and rain_

The End

A/N: I know, really short. I'll write another fic on Monday - I kinda want to do a Sirius/Lupin fic - I love gay couples. D But Tonks and Lupin are a sweet couple anyway.. and so are Ron and Hermione - WHEN WILL THEY ADMIT THEIR FEELINGS! Arr!


	2. Some Good News

So I decided to make a second chapter. I really liked this little story and I have plans for it, evil plans. By the way, remember that currently Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny are at Hogwarts at the time of this story, as it is set six months after Sirius died - it may be innacurate I'm terrible at keeping track of time and although I'm reading HBP AGAIN, right now, for the second time (I'm gonna keep going through them, they're so damn good.) I still forget important facts. So, again, sorry if I miss out anything important.  
Remember, I had no plans to continue this fic, but for some reason.. I did.

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**Tears and Rain, chapter 2**

"I'm going to try and get this place completely finished by tomorrow." Molly said to Arthur and Remus, looking pointidly at a pile of books on the floor. "And I want to get rid of all this dust lying about. There's something in another cupboard upstairs, Remus.. probably another boggart. Moody's not here this morning so I was hoping that you could take a look at it. If you want to wait for Moody, that's fine. I just want to get everything done today."

Lupin was only half paying attention due to still being half-asleep - but still paying more attention than Arthur who was now staring at an elastic band, trying to grasp how Muggles used them. He nodded "Right you are, Molly." and took his seat beside Arthur.

Cheery and awake, Tonks was trotting down the stairs singing to herself. All the attention shifted to her, but Lupin could swear that Molly had thrown him a curious glance. It was probably just him being paranoid. "Morning, Molly, Auther... Remus" she grinned, winking at Lupin while no one was looking.

Lupin gave her a quick grin before filling her in on Molly's plans for today. "Oh, and Molly, what are we going to do about Mundugus Fletcher?" Asked Lupin, finishing his explanation. He was sure he heard Tonks mutter something like "prick" under her breath. Although he completely agreed, he didn't take the conversation any further.

Mundugus was stealing stuff that used to belong to Sirius - now Harry's stuff, as Harry had inherited 12 Grimmauld Place and therefore everything in it was his, including - unfortunately - Kreacher, who they kept a close eye on the past few months, given that he was the main cause for the death of Sirius.. if Kreacher hadn't lied to Harry, Harry wouldn't have gone to the Minestry and Sirius wouldn't have had to follow him. Not that he blamed Harry, of course.

Molly put the breakfast onto plates with her wand, giving up on the whole "muggle breakfast" theme that seemed to be going on. Arthur, who looked betrayed, started talking about cars. Once everyone had been given out their breakfast, they tucked in to an enjoyable muggle fry-up. No one else was talking but Auther, except Molly's occasional "yes, dear"s. Lupin and Tonks threw each other occasional sly glances, followed by quicky saying something like "Mm.. Molly, this is absolutely delicious."

By the time it got to noon, the rain was pouring down hard. They could hear it pelting against the windows, when the wind wasn't shattering them about. There was a dark mood upon the house, hardly anyone spoke since breakfast. This was clearly not a day to be enjoyed, and to add to the dis-enjoyment, Molly informed them that Snape was coming over to discuss something at 3. Remus groaned, but didn't say anything in protest. He was trying not to show his intense hate for Snape - especially around Harry, who he had been trying to convince that he didn't dislike Snape as much as Harry thought he did.

Three o'clock came pretty fast considering there was nothing to do. Remus was surprised Molly wasn't nagging them to clean up - but it seemed she, herself, wasn't up to it anymore. It was just too much of a dreary day. There was a knock on the door, and in came Snape, scowling as usual.

"Good afternoon, Severus" said Molly, followed by "mm"s and nods from the others, who looked up at him for two seconds then ignored him. Snape didn't particularly care, wether he noticed the atmosphere or not. "Can I offer you some tea?" Askd Molly.

"No, thanks Molly, I'm not staying for long. Just came along to pass on a message from Dumbledore, Ron and Harry can come over for Christmas after all" Said Snape, although looking intensely disgusted. "I just thought I ought to warn you to keep an eye on them. Personally, I don't even think they should be allowed into Hogsmeade - but Dumbledore sees it safe."

Molly, however, looked absolutely delighted. "Oh, I must tell the twins the good news immediately! I think we will have a full house this year! I-" but she trailed off, no longer looking delighted. She had just remembered Percy's absolute refusal to return home for Christmas, for the second year in a row. She frowned slighlty, but stepped aside for Severus to enter. He, unsurprisingly, did not.

"Must be off, Molly, I need to return to Hogwarts, got a class in an hour." CRACK. He disapparated, clearly to somewhere near Hogwarts as it is imposible to apparate inside the castle walls.

The mood seemed to lighten up a bit. Molly, although reminded of Percy, was happy that she was getting Ron and Harry over the Christmas holidays - she didn't even flinch when she was reminded that Fleur was also coming to join them.

Tonks and Remus made constant excuses to go to their bedrooms at the same time. It was impossible for Molly not to catch on to what was going on, but they really couldn't help it.

The mood had certainly brightened up.

End of Chapter 2

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Yeah, so.. R/R please. I don't mind criticism. 


	3. Hurt

A/N: I'm not gonna write a chapter for Ron and Harry visiting, as JKR has already done so in Half-Blood Prince. Sooo.. you know how that goes. Well. These are the events leading up to it and after it. After it will probably be in the next chapter though.

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Tears and Rain - Chapter 3 

The day passed in pretty quickly after they had heard the good news. Even Fleur arriving home giggling like mad at a joke Bill had made, did not put Mrs Weasley down. They were all going home for Christmas - minus Percy. But Ron, Harry, Ginny, Bill, Charlie, Fred and George. Molly and Arthur were to head back to the Burrow in the morning, Charlie was to arrive home the next morning, then Harry, Ron and Ginny - the day after that. It was all turning out so well.

At dinnertime, the table was full of laughter. As much as she dispised the idea, Fleur was really starting to grow on Molly. "This deener eez very nice" she stated, giving Molly an encouraging smile. Molly smiled back, but did not reply. However, this did not quieten Fleur a bit, as Bill had said something that wasn't even funny and Fleur was in hysterics. "Oh, my man eez funny."

Tonks stood up, gathered her plates and got out her wand to set a cleaning spell. "Let me get that, dear." Said Mrs Weasley. "Just leave it beside the sink."

Tonks nodded and obeyed, smiling at Mrs Weasley. "Do you think Harry would mind if I stayed here for Christmas, Molly?"

Molly looked somewhat shocked, and said "Of course dear, but you can come back to The Burrow with us if you like. I'm sure Remus would like to come, too." She set Remus a look which told him to agree if he valued his life.

"..of course. I'd love to, Molly" Said Remus. "I wouldn't mind seeing Harry anyway."

Tonks shook her head, and smiled lightly. "No, Molly, I don't want to be in your way." she said, "but thank you anyway - no Remus, you go, Harry will want to see you anyway." she added, as Lupin opened his mouth in protest.

"Well, the invitation's always open" Said Molly, rising to her feet, and turning to her husband. "Right Arthur, I suppose we better get packing for tomorrow. You too, Remus." She added, nodding at Lupin. Lupin nodded and made his way upstairs, followed by Tonks. Molly sighed. "When will those to notice that we know they're together and stop with this pointless act?"

Arthur nodded in agreement, "Give them time, dear."

Molly frowned. "I had hoped they'd be spending Christmas together, you know.. with us." Sighing, and clearly giving up, she made her way upstairs closely followed by her husband. The Ministry cars were coming to pick them up at 7am and they didn't like to be kept waiting, so it was a case of pack your clothes and go right to bed.

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Lupin sighed, as he finished packing his last article of clothing. Why had Tonks refused to come to the Burrow with them? He had been looking foreward to spending Christmas with everyone he loved. Now the most important person in his life right now was refusing to come. As if Tonks had read his mind, there was a gentle knock at the door which could have only been hers. "Come in" he said, keeping his voice down. Tonks entered the room, and smiled at Lupin. Lupin vaguely returned the smile, sighed, and sat on his bed. 

"I know.. you wanted to spend Christmas with me.. I'm sorry.. I just.. don't want to be a pain, treading on Molly's hospitality like that.. she's been kind enough to me as it is." Sighed Tonks, sitting next to Remus. "And I'll miss you, I will. So much. But remember that Harry needs you more than I do."

Lupin just looked away, clearly huffy. "Molly asked you to come to the Burrow with us. I don't get why you couldn't." Tonks went to open her mouth to reply, when Lupin cut in "I don't want to hear why either."

The look of concern on her face changed to a look of complete shock. "Moony.."

"Don't call me that. James and Sirius called me that. It's their name for me, not yours."

Her look shifted again to pure anger, but she said nothing, just stormed out.

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A/N: Mmm.. yeah, so.. another chapter down. Please tell me if this story's crap cuz if it is there's no point in me writing it any further. 


	4. Konstantine

**Disclaimer- Don't own the characters, don't own the song - It is sung by Something Corporate and it's name is Konstantine, so technically I don't own the chapter title either. Yay! I'm a lazy bum.**

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**Chapter 4 - Konstantine**

Tonks sighed as she slumped down on the chair in the living room. Why was Remus being so cruel? Had she done something wrong? She just didn't want to spend Christmas at The Burrow…

_I can't imagine all the people that you know  
__And the places that you go  
__When the lights are turned down low  
__And I don't understand  
__All the things you've seen  
__But I'm slipping in between  
__You and your big... dreams_

_It's always you and my big dreams_

There was a knock on the door. Remus entered, a guilty-looking frown on his lips. Silence filled the room for a while as they looked at each other.

Remus sat down beside her and sighed. "This really isn't working, is it?"

Those words struck Tonks hard.

_And you tell me  
__That it's over  
__But I can't stand here in a patch of four leaf clover  
__And you're restless  
__And I'm naked  
__You've got to get out  
__You can't stand to see me shaking  
__No, would you let me go_

"Get out," she whispered. Her voice was broken and full of hurt. "OUT!"

_And you don't want to be here in the future  
__So you say  
__The present's just a pleasant  
__Interruption to the past  
__And you don't want to look much closer  
__'Cause you're afraid to find out all the hope  
__That you had sent into the sky by now had... crashed  
__And it did because of me_

Remus jumped up in shock, obviously not expecting this reaction. Slowly, he exited the room. Tonks sat there with tears pouring out of her eyes.

_And then you bring me home  
__Afraid to find out that you're alone, no  
__And I'm sleeping in your living room  
__But we don't have much room  
__To live_

The past few days were obviously too good to be true. Lupin had finally accepted the fact that love is enough for a relationship to work. Age doesn't matter. She could even deal with his full-moon activities.

_And I had dreams that I would learn to play guitar  
__Maybe cross the country  
__Become a rock star  
__And there was hope in me  
__That I could take you there  
__But dammit you're so young  
__But I don't think I care  
__And if I hurt you then I'm sorry  
__It's just this guilt has got the best of me_

She curled up on the couch, shaking with anger. The man she had accepted so openly had thrown her away so easily – as if she meant nothing to him.

Slowly, she drifted off to sleep.

_I'm not your star..._

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A/N: I know this chapter is really short, and if it weren't for the song, it would take like 5 seconds to read but I really don't have the time right now to make a proper update and this is the best I could do – sorry. Please R/R, I don't really want to continue unless I know some people are actually reading it. 


	5. The Lake

**Chapter 5 – The Lake**

'_What have I done?'_ Thought Remus, as he climbed up the stairs slowly to get to his room. As he entered, he sat down on the bed, thinking to himself. '_It was for the best – right? I'm only going to hurt her... I'm too old and too poor...' _

But even so – Tonks was the best think that ever happened to him. Did he really want to give that all up? Yes – he did. He really didn't want to hurt her. He wasn't doing this for him – it was for Tonks. He just knew it would end up hurting her.

But was it too late? Had he already hurt her? He sighed, as he lay down on the bed, thinking about Tonks, and how beautiful she was, and how happy she made him feel – even if they were just to be friends.

He really couldn't bare Tonks being angry at him.

SLAM. Remus awoke to a pissed off looking Mrs. Weasley that morning. "What did you do?" She barked, throwing the covers off of him.

"Aah... Molly!" Remus curled up into a ball on the bed. "You're lucky I don't sleep naked."

"Don't Aah Molly me!" she snarled, as if ready to claw him. "Tonks left this morning crying! You did something, didn't you?"

Remus shot up. "She left?"

"Yes, she left. Said she'd be back in five minutes. That was an hour ago!"

"Where did she go?"

"I don't know."

Remus dashed off the bed, collecting bits of clothes. "Molly, you go to the Burrow – I expect the kids will be arriving soon. I'm going to look for her."

Molly looked satisfied. "You'd better go look for her. I want you back later though, and for goodness sake, don't let anyone else know that Tonks is missing; Arthur and I are worried enough."

"Of course I won't, Molly. You go ahead – I'll probably be there by the time they arrive – will you take my case with you please?" He pointed to a tiny case which could only possibly fit two items of clothing in it.

"...yes, okay. We really need to take you shopping." She joked, lightening the mood a bit. "Just... make sure she gets back safely, okay?"

Remus nodded, and Molly exited the room to let him get dressed. Remus dashed about, pulling on odd socks, a really old and scabby pair of trousers, and a t-shirt that was far too big for him – this was no time to be picky. He practically dived into the wardrobe to find a pair of scruffy shoes which he only wore if he were to go jogging or something.

Pulling on his jacket, he ran out of the room and out the door, not stopping to say goodbye. It was only when he had ran a quarter of a mile away from number 12 Grimmauld Place that he'd realized he'd forgotten to change his underwear – not that he cared, of course, this was far too important.

He came to a sudden halt, realizing something – he had no idea where she'd be. Remus sighed. "Think, think, think!" he mumbled to himself, earning him many strange looks from the passers by – not that he wasn't getting any before, of course, considering his scabby mismatched clothes. Then it came to him – the lake

**Flashback**

"_Are you sure?" Asked Remus, stroking her hair gently as they gazed in amazement at the beautiful sight before them. _

"_Of course I'm sure." Smiled Tonks. "I love you so much, Remus. I see no reason why we shouldn't be together – I don't care how old you are, and I don't care how much money you have, I just want to be with the man I love."_

_Remus pulled her to the ground playfully, and stroked her face. Tonks wrapped her legs around his waist and kissed him deeply as they tore each other's clothes off. _

Remus started running in the general direction of the lake, when he halted again. Nearly smacking himself on the face for forgetting he could apparate, he disappeared with a CRACK and re-appeared on the edge of the lake with a louder CRACK – and there she was - curled up at the edge of the water, crying softly to herself. She hadn't even jumped when he had appeared – in fact, she hardly showed signs of noticing apart from the stabbing glare she gave Remus, clearly warning him not to take a step towards her.

"Tonks – please come back. Everyone's worried sick." Pleaded Lupin, kneeling down beside her.

"Leave me alone" she sobbed. "I hate you."

"You know that's not true." He replied, putting an arm around her. "Look, I'm sorry. I just don't want you to get hurt."

"Is this what you call not being hurt?" She sniffed, leaning against him. "I just want to be with the man I love."

Remus looked into her teary eyes, wiping them softly. "You know I love you… but you know how I become on a full moon. You could wind up getting critically injured - and I couldn't live with myself knowing that I'm the one who did it to you."

"Then I'll stay away on a full moon. I will!" She wailed, clinging onto him. "Please, Remus! Just give us a chance."

Kissing her forehead softly, he cupped her chin in his hands and looked into her eyes again. "Come on – let's go to the Burrow. We can talk about this later."

Tonks shook her head. "I don't want to go to the Burrow – please… you go. I'll stay at Grimmauld Place – just don't worry about me, okay? I promise not to do anything stupid."

"Okay." He sighed, kissing her softly.

"I love you." She smiled, squeezing his hand gently. "Please come back to me soon."

"I will, sweetie." He grinned, kissing her on the cheek. "Love you."

They both stood up and disappeared with a CRACK, and both arrived at different destinations. Remus didn't even have to knock on the door, because Molly had heard him apparate and opened the door to let him in.

"I found her – she's gone back to 12 Grimmauld Place and she promised not to run away." He panted.

Molly chortled and let him in. "I hope you sorted things out."

"Yes," smiled Lupin. "I believe we did."

**A/N: Don't be fooled by the happy ending – my story's not nearly completed! D Thanks for the reviews, everyone – I'm glad people are reading my story. Now I'm going to shamelessly advertise my other one – can people please check out my fic "Stirred" (previously named "You Came Along" – don't be fooled into thinking it's a romance between Harry and the new girl – I have evil plans. **

**ANYWAY back to this fic. I want to thank SavvyRavenclaw20 for keeping me going – your reviews motivated me. **

**Thanks to everyone else who reviewed too – I really do appreciate it.**


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